Chapter 71 p. 6: To Chaix

Paris, April 22, 1818,

To my dear friend Chaix;

I’m worried that my Coco is experiencing a continual agitation, and that I myself am experiencing some discomfort, just as you predicted when you spoke to me about Pinel and Moreau, with whom, no doubt, you often discuss me. I would ask that you take an interest in my fate with regard to these two gentlemen, encourage them to meet, and obtain from them a promise to leave me alone; I am incapable of doing them harm myself. 

If you would, please deliver your reply to my cousin Comaille, so that it is not taken from my mailbox. 

With sincere wishes for your friendship, and hoping this letter finds you in good health,

Your devoted friend,

M.B. 

May 12, 1818

To my dear friend Chaix;

I am writing to you rather than going to see you. I know that you are about to leave, and I fear that I will not find you at your house, so I can ask you to go to Mr. Pinel and Moreau, for the reasons I described to you in my last letter, dated April 22.

Since our last conversation about the goblins, I have been more tormented than ever before. My Coco is more restless than usual, so much so that I had to lock him in his cage. If you could, please give me the dirt on why the magicians of Avignon refuse to give me back my life, when even the magicians of Paris would do so. Please answer me, let me know what to expect. 

Sincerely,

M.B. 

To Mr. Chaix, Paris

May 18, 1818

My dear friend, 

You must have received two letters from me, dated April 22 and May 12. I am writing to you to once again ask that you tell me what you’ve learned concerning the Avignon Society, and regarding Mr. Pinel and Moreau, who live in Paris. 

If you would also be so kind as to tell me if the numbers of the goblin society has increased; that is, if there are any of these wretches who I do not know. In the event you are unable to see the two people I have just mentioned, I beg you to write them, so that they would be willing to end their affairs with me. 

You know, my friend, that I have been suffering for twenty-three years and that I suffer constantly today. Please, grant me the kindness of your reply, so I know what I can expect. 

Madame R–, who I had the pleasure of meeting with to discuss my sad situation and the troubles I am experiencing, agree with me: she is surprised you haven’t replied to me, and invites you to reply to me. She specifically suggested that I ask you to. 

My fear that I may not see you drives me to write you this letter. My hope is that, through this letter, you will help me gain some relief from my ills, and finally, give me confidence in recovering my freedom and peace. 

Your servant and friend,
M.B.

Chaix had a busy schedule, and I was kind enough to excuse him from replying to me for that, and went to bid him farewell on his departure. However, I was still forced to write to him in Carpentras to remind him of his promises. 

To Mr. Chaix, at Carpentras,

June 17, 1818,

Dear sir,

I had the pleasure of embracing you the day before your departure, and I learned with sorrow of the troubles that arose, and caused you to return to your homeland. I hope you enjoy good health in Carpentras. 

Please remember the visit you paid me here, where we discussed Pinel and Moreau, your great friends, and as well the work I was doing to oppose them, and the goblins you knew in Avignon. All these interest me greatly. 

And also remember the threats you made to me, on behalf of the physicist and the doctor of Salpétrière in this town, that if I persisted in writing the memoirs you saw me start, I would expose myself to being poisoned or killed. And when I went to Madame R–, you were waiting for me there, and you reiterated those same threats you’d made that morning. The answers I gave you were the same I’d given you before: I did not fear death. The next day you came again to the same lady’s house, and turned the conversation to the same subject, still in the presence of the Belgian gentleman [1], who never ceased to praise my conduct while at the same time approving everything I was doing against the men who tormented me for 20 years. Madame R– agreed with every point. 

You changed your tone then, telling me that your friends in Paris had requested that I ask you, a a favor to you, not to write anything against them; that their intention was to give me peace of mind, but they had to work with the consent of their colleagues in Avignon, and would be writing them to that effect. You didn’t even doubt that they had responded to those requests, and none of this came to fruition. 

So, still finding myself persecuted, even despite your promises, I felt I had to send you four letters, one on April 22, one on May 212, the third, June 18, this same month and year. But you were aware of all of the indignities inflicted on me by the people you claimed wanted to set me free, and you had no reply. 

I promised you that I would write to you the day you left, and write to you again in Carpentras if they continued to torment me. So in this, I’ve kept my promise. And you promised me, when you embraced me, that I would not suffer long, and that I would enjoy my freedom and tranquility soon. But I am still tormented, night and day. Though I have noticed that my suffering has been less severe since your departure. 

Now you are only 14 miles from Avignon, please write me when you find out if Pinel and Moreau will agree to give me peace. Whether or not they do, I will never submit to infernal domination. It is time for all this to end. The momentary comforts I am enjoying today cannot satisfy me. I must be completely at peace, and I will not let myself be lulled into complacency over this. I will not stop working on my memoir opposing these goblins, because I know that their attacks against me will only grow stronger in time.  

And so I hope that you will be willing to work on my behalf, as you have so often promised. I’ve been told you’ve complained about my lack of gratitude, that you’ve bought me fifty dinners and almost as many lunches, and I’ve never returned them, but in this you’re mistaken. You’ve only seen me twice at your table, and while I’ve accepted a few glasses of liquor or brandy from you, I thought they were shared with me in good will, and these should not be counted as meals. Because then you might have some actual reason to complain about me. 

Best wishes,

M.B. 

To Mr. Chaix, Landowner in Carpentras

July 25, 1818. 

My dear friend,

I had the honor of writing to you on the 17th of last month. I still hope that my letters will find you in good help, and above all, to be of service to your colleagues and Avignon, and find out if Mr. Pinel and Mr. Moreau–your friends, not mine–are finally willing to free me from their authority. You’ve assured me that the people here are only too happy to release me from their power, you’ve said as much to me in person, but now you maintain a profound silence regarding all my letters. However, I am still suffering while waiting for you to fulfill your promises. 

You have not replied to my last letter, which I addressed to you in Carpentras. I feel I must write to you again, perhaps I can provoke you to helping me obtain some happier results than what I’ve been waiting for by bothering you. I’m sure this negligence on your part is due to your work furnishing your new home, and now, I assume you must have had the rest and time necessary to take an interest in my requests. Believe me, it’s about time. 

My respects to your sister and brother-in-law. 

I am still, while waiting for your answer,

Your devoted friend,

M.B.

I have never been able to understand how a compatriot, who called himself my friend, could show such striking indifference. This man who I considered a good person, to whom I’d never shown anything other than friendship and cordiality, my compatriot, could deceive me, betray me, and abandon me to the wickedness of my enemies, even defend them, feed me promises of hope that he would represent me and make them cease their persecutions and abuse, when he, himself, accused me of ingratitude and rudeness, saying I’d cost him fifty meals without giving him a single one. It hurt me to see myself treated so shamefully by someone who it had never occurred to me to distrust. And this, on the part of a Carpentracian? I can only regard him as nothing but the cruellest of enemies, and will never see him otherwise.

[1] Unsure who “the Belgian gentleman” is, will update this if I can clarify that point.