Letter from Etienne Prieur

May 24, 1818

Sir,

I received your letter on the 19th of the month. Among the excellent advice you give me, I see with some sadness that that there are aspects of personality unworthy of a good Christian. However, out of my respect for you, I will give you an account of my conduct. 

I came to the Seminary of Amiens not to strive for a new vocation, but to enter the faith under the care of a good shepherd. [1] If I will not have the happiness of becoming a priest, at least I will be faithful. As you know, our lord came to save the sinner Magdalen, the Samaritan woman who had five husbands, the publican, the bad thief, and myself as well, who is the least of these. 

I came to the Seminary of Amiens, not to try my vocation, but to enter under the guidance of the good shepherd; and if I do not have the happiness of becoming a priest, I will at least be a religious. Our Lord, as you know, Sir, came to save the sinner Madeleine, the Samaritan woman who had had five husbands, the publican, the bad thief, and for me who am worth much less. Do not be surprised if, tired of a wandering, pointless life, I came to expose my misery to the doctor who raised Lazarus, who healed the leper and restored sight and hearing and speech to those who were deprived of them. Like the woman of Jerusalem, I wanted to touch the robe of the divine master, to be healed of my wounds; like the paralytic, I cried out in the distress in which I found myself: “Son of David, have pity on me.” Our Lord, touched, no doubt, by my extreme desire to serve him, has made me return to the fold. Many times, dear sir, I have scandalized you; but Saint Peter, who is a very great Saint, denied his God. Could I not hope, poor sinner that I am, to find in your eyes some measure of pardon for my inconsistencies? 

I ask your pardon for the mistakes I have made in your presence. I apologize for my past conduct. I am neither a sorcerer nor tempted by the devil, neither have I had, nor wish to have, any sort of relationship with the dark seducer of souls. Leave him in his hell, and rid yourself of all these ideas of spells, possession, and magic, which can only be an obstacle to your eternal salvation.  

Your letter cost 16 sols; I am not rich, I am not in a position to receive other letters. So, dear sir, although you honor me greatly by writing to me, I can see no way of my being useful to you, and invite you to refrain from writing me further. I commend myself to your prayers, which cannot fail to be pleasing to the Lord. Please do not share my address, I must emphasize the importance of this. [2]

Etienne †

Grand Seminary of Amiens, suburb of Noyon, department of the Somme.

[Note: This letter is peppered with “monsieur,” which translates directly as “sir”, but that doesn’t really capture the friendly formality of the word. It slots in where you might have chosen to use someone’s name, but with a bit more polish, and in English “sir” feels cold. This letter should perhaps be more formal, more polite, and perhaps more guarded as well.]
https://archive.org/details/lesfarfadetsouto00berb3/page/331/mode/1up

[1] the wording is perhaps intentionally ambiguous, and could mean “under the care of the good shepherd,” or “under the care of a priest.” 

[2] 1 franc is worth about $4.50 give or take, 20 sols to the franc, so the privilege of writing Berbiguier back is worth about $3.50. Not that this sort of conversion is ever entirely meaningful.